Many women who choose to become surrogates are married, but if you are single, you’re likely questioning if being a single surrogate is even an option for you.
The answer is yes!
Although many women who choose to carry for intended parents are married, there are many instances where single surrogates provide the gift of parenthood to a family who is not capable of having a baby on their own. Given the impact of such a life-changing decision, you want to fully educate yourself on surrogacy before making any decisions.
This guide explains how the process is similar to becoming a surrogate when married, explores the differences, and informs you of certain things to consider as a single surrogate. Anytime you have questions about surrogacy and how your relationship status may impact your experience, you can fill out this online form to get more information from a surrogacy specialist.
Keep reading to learn more about becoming a surrogate mother who’s not married and what you can expect along your journey.
Becoming a Single Surrogate: What to Consider before Making a Decision
When you consider becoming a gestational surrogate, you are doing so to carry a pregnancy to term for intended parents who cannot do so on their own. Your goals are to give them the priceless gift of a child. There are no requirements that state a surrogate must be married or in a relationship, so becoming a single surrogate is an option for achieving these goals.
When it comes to applying to be a surrogate and completing the medical process, your experience will be identical to that of a married surrogate. The brief version of your surrogacy process will include:
- Being screened to determine if your body is ready and able to carry a pregnancy to term
- Finding intended parents you want to carry for
- Signing legal contracts
- Completing the embryo transfer
- Confirming the pregnancy
- Doctors visits to ensure your and the baby’s health
- Carrying the pregnancy to term and delivery
Although this process mirrors that of all gestational surrogates, married or not, because you are single, there are many different aspects to consider along the way. Continue reading to learn more about those aspects and how they may impact your decision to pursue becoming a surrogate.
Support System Challenges Single Surrogates May Face
As part of the requirements to become a surrogate, no matter your relationship status, you have to have previously given birth. If you are a single mother, you will want to evaluate your support system and the challenges surrogacy and pregnancy can create, such as:
- Having childcare in place for appointments with your surrogacy specialist, doctor appointments, delivery, and more
- Having the needed support if you are ordered to bed rest for a certain period of time
- Explaining your surrogacy decision to your children, friends, and family
- Your place of employment understanding your required absences
- Everyday challenges of being a single mother
- Many other challenges, depending on your specific situation
These are just a few of the most common challenges single surrogates face. None of these are mentioned to scare you away from becoming a surrogate — more so to provide you with things to consider before making any decisions. Having the appropriate support system in place can help eliminate these challenges and make your surrogacy go as smoothly as possible.
If you have concerns about your support system when considering becoming a single surrogate, fill out this online form to learn more about the pros and cons of choosing surrogacy in your specific situation. Specialists are here to help guide you and determine if becoming a carrier is right for you.
Dating as a Surrogate
You may be single now, but that doesn’t mean you always will be or that it has to stay that way. Although there are no specific guidelines against dating, if you are considering becoming a surrogate, there are some things to consider in the event that you meet someone new.
- Talking to your boyfriend or girlfriend: Surrogacy is a complicated process. Explaining your plans or decision to be a carrier for intended parents may be a difficult conversation at first, but it is necessary for a successful relationship and surrogacy. Explaining the process, your motivations, and more will help any new partners understand your decision.
- Impacts on your relationship: As mentioned, there are no specific restrictions on dating as a surrogate, but there may be impacts on your relationship along the way. If you intend on having sexual contact with your partner, they will need to be screened for any diseases or infections prior to any contact taking place. This is to ensure the safety of you and the baby. If they are positive, limitations on contact may take place until the baby is born.
- Supporting your decision: Talking about your plans to become a surrogate is one thing; having the support and understanding of your boyfriend or girlfriend is another. Not everyone will see eye to eye on surrogacy, and that is ok. If it begins to impact your relationship or well-being, though, it can make things more complicated. Having open and honest discussions about your motivations and surrogacy goals can help put you both on the same page and ensure your significant other provides the support you may need along the way.
Each surrogacy and relationship will have its own topics to consider. When you feel the time is right, communicating your plans is essential to a strong and healthy relationship. Specialists are available to provide any insight you or your partner may need along the way.
Benefits of surrogacy
Becoming a surrogate mother who’s not married will come with its own challenges, but do not forget the purpose and goals that led you to consider surrogacy in the first place. Surrogacy can provide benefits for everyone involved. Benefits like:
- The ability to provide intended with the gift of parenthood
- Compensated surrogacy can help financially along the way
- Personal satisfaction knowing you provided the life-changing opportunity of a baby to a family who was unable to carry a child on their own
- Experiencing the joys of pregnancy without actually having another child of your own
- Building a new relationship with the intended parents
- So much more
Surrogacy benefits everyone involved. There will be challenges from the process and pregnancy, but staying focused on the overall outcome can make your entire surrogacy experience much more fulfilling. If you are considering becoming a single surrogate, fill out this online form to learn more about the possibility of fulfilling your dreams of providing the life-changing gift of a child to a family who cannot carry a baby themselves.