Many women who decide to become surrogates have a husband or spouse to support them throughout their surrogacy journey. If you are single, have a boyfriend or girlfriend, or are just starting to date, you may be wondering if surrogacy is still an option for you.
The answer is yes, but there are some things to consider.
This guide provides the information you need to know when you are a surrogate dating or are in the early stages of a relationship.
Keep in mind, gestational surrogates who are dating are not held to higher standards than married surrogates – but there are a few suggestions to help make the surrogacy process as successful as possible for everyone involved. Anytime you have questions about single surrogates dating or any other surrogacy-related question, fill out this form to get more information from a trained professional.
Until then, keep reading this guide on what you need to know about dating as a surrogate.
What to Know About Dating as a Surrogate Mother
From start to finish, the process of surrogacy can take a long time. It would not be fair to have to put your life on hold throughout this process and keep you from dating or pursuing a new relationship. But how does a surrogate dating affect the surrogacy process?
Although there are no specific restrictions or guidelines, seeing how the surrogacy process impacts you and the intended parents, there are some things to keep in mind when dating as a surrogate. Below you will find suggestions on how to handle new relationships best.
Being Open with Your Surrogacy Professional
The goal of becoming a surrogate is to provide the gift of parenthood to a family or individual who cannot give birth to a child on their own, not to be micromanaged. Although your specialist will not purposely intrude on your personal life, if you start dating and feel your relationship may have the potential for sexual contact, it’s essential to inform your professional of your new relationship.
You will be tested for infectious diseases during the screening process to become a surrogate to ensure the baby cannot contract any diseases or infections during pregnancy or delivery. Before having any sexual contact with a new partner after your screening, he or she will need to be tested the same way. This helps protect you and the baby throughout every step of the process, no matter what stage of the surrogacy you may be at.
A positive test does not mean you have to end your relationship, but it could mean limitations on sexual contact until after the baby has been born. Keep in mind, when you become a surrogate, you will sign a contract listing the guidelines and restrictions. At no point will there be anything stating you cannot date or limiting who you choose to date, but contact with a partner with a communicable disease or infection could impact your pregnancy and go against what was agreed upon.
To learn more about surrogate dating or get further clarification on what your surrogacy contract may include, fill out this online form to get more information from a trained professional. Specialists prefer you to live your life to the fullest and want to ensure you and the baby’s safety during this life-changing journey.
Explaining Surrogacy to Your Partner
For many, the surrogacy process can seem somewhat complicated. Explaining your choice to become a surrogate to someone you have just begun dating may seem difficult, but it’s necessary for a successful relationship. Surrogate dating means talking about your decision. Discussing potential limitations on sexual contact or that there may be screening or testing involving them can be a challenge, but your surrogacy specialists will be by your side every step of the way with any assistance you may need.
Ultimately, if you are in a position that you feel the need to discuss your surrogacy with the person you are dating, you likely feel a deep enough connection to each other that they will fully support and your decision. Some tips to consider when discussing your decision include:
- Sharing your motivations behind why you chose to become a surrogate
- Fully discussing the process
- Discuss their involvement in the process and potential impacts
- Explaining what to expect during your pregnancy
- Asking them questions and discussing any concerns they have
- Remaining open throughout the surrogacy process
- Anything else that helps you both remain on the same page
Like each surrogacy, every relationship and is different. How your partner responds to your discussions about surrogacy can vary. Communication is key to a healthy and successful future. If you are dating as a surrogate mother and feel your relationship is becoming serious, discussing how your boyfriend feels about surrogacy (or girlfriend or other partner) is a crucial step for your relationship and your surrogacy.
Fill out this online form to speak with a trained professional about the best ways to bring up surrogacy to your significant other.
Building Your Support System
If you are a surrogate, dating can sometimes be put on the back burner because you don’t want to complicate things with your surrogacy or your partner. Although this is your personal choice, you may find peace of mind knowing that having a relationship during your surrogacy can be beneficial.
Having someone other than your specialists by your side during this journey can be beneficial. Surrogacy is an amazing journey, but it also has challenges. Pregnancy can be difficult to navigate on your own, from appointments, to changes to your body and more. Having the love and support of your boyfriend or girlfriend along the way makes it easier to manage. Support from friends and family is great, but the intimate and emotional connection you share with your partner is hard to compete with.
The surrogacy process is a somewhat small timeframe in the grand scheme of life, but it is a primary point of focus during that time. For however long the process takes, it will impact your day-to-day life, as well as the lives of those closest to you. If you are considering dating as a surrogate, it is essential to realize the impact this will have and express your thoughts, concerns, and decisions with your significant other when you feel the time is right.
Whether you are single and ready to date or are just starting to date, surrogacy is an option, and specialists are here to help guide you through this life-changing journey!